Raising Warriors, Not Witnesses: Why Kids Need a Physical Outlet for Childhood Exposure to Violence and Aggression
In 1961, Albert Bandura asked a deceptively simple question: Can children learn to act aggressively just by watching someone else act aggressively? The answer, as it turned out, was a resounding yes.
Bandura’s now-famous Bobo doll experiment revealed that childhood exposure to violencE
-even indirect or observed—can result in aggressive behavior. Children exposed to violent behavior by adults who struck and shouted at an inflatable clown were far more likely to do the same. With this, Bandura revolutionized how psychologists understand violence, aggression, and child development.
More than six decades later, however, kids aren’t watching adults beat up clown dolls. They’re watching YouTubers scream profanities, playing games that reward physical aggression, and streaming shows where violent behavior is stylish, funny, and normalized. Yet the mechanism is the same: observe, internalize, repeat.
Let me be clear, while often associated with violence or harm, aggression is not inherently negative, and it can serve adaptive purposes such as asserting boundaries, pursuing goals, or defending oneself in threatening situations (Geen, 2001). Aggression can take many forms and is categorized in distinct classifications based on intent and motivation.
In the following piece I specifically addresses violent aggression, defined as behavior intended to cause physical harm, particularly as it develops through media exposure and childhood modeling.
The research is clear: children exposed to digital media violence are learning aggression.
And if they’re conditioned to act aggressively, it’s important to ask: Where does that aggression go?
This blog explores how repeated childhood exposure to violence, especially via media, shapes the human nervous system and triggers aggressive responses.
I argue that structured physical outlets are consequential for overall well-being, helping children process, and redirect their aggression into resilience versus risk.
🧠 Learning to Hit by Watching It Happen: When Children Experience Aggression Firsthand
Albert Bandura’s Bobo doll experiment was designed to test whether children could acquire aggressive behavior simply by observing a model. In the experiment, children exposed to adults behaving violently (hitting and yelling at the doll) were more likely to act aggressively themselves (Bandura et al., 1961).
Even without reinforcement or consequences, children replicated both physical aggression and verbal hostility. This experiment illustrated that childhood exposure to violence directly influences behavioral outcomes, often triggering reactive aggression that mimics the observed behavior.
🎮 The Bobo Doll Goes Digital: When Children Learn Aggression From Screens
As media exposure becomes a primary source of behavioral modeling, children learn to act with aggressive behavior from influencers, peers, games, and videos that reward predatory aggression and ridicule weakness. As Khadka (2024) notes, aggressive behavior in children today often stems from digital observational learning (Khadka, 2024).
These platforms teach children not only to normalize aggression, but to celebrate it.
Whether it's a game rewarding headshots or viral content that glorifies fighting, the result is consistent: children exposed to digital violence often exhibit increased physical aggression, a higher tolerance for violent crime, domestic violence, and more aggression in their social interactions (Grossman & DeGaetano, 2014).
🧬 How Biological Factors and Aggression Impact the Nervous System
Aggression is not just behavioral, it’s neurological. Repeated exposure to violence in childhood activates stress-response circuits in the nervous system, reinforcing pathways that favor fight over flight. When the brain frequently experiences threats, real or digital, it begins to normalize violent behavior (Grossman & Paulsen, 2016).
This has long-term consequences for mental health, emotional regulation, and social behavior. According to modern developmental psychology, children exposed to chronic media aggression often display reduced empathy, increased impulsivity, and difficulty differentiating reactive aggression from appropriate assertiveness (Khadka, 2024).
Biological factors, such as hormonal imbalances and heightened cortisol responses, may further intensify aggressive tendencies in children exposed to consistent violent content (Grossman & Paulsen, 2016).
These biological factors are particularly pronounced during adolescence, a developmental stage when hormonal surges and ongoing brain maturation make teens more vulnerable to desensitization to violence and emotionally charged media stimuli.
Studies have shown that repeated observation of violent acts, especially in early developmental stages, contributes to a desensitized response in the brain’s emotional regulation centers (Grossman, 2018).Over time, children exposed to both environmental stressors and modeled violent acts may come to perceive aggression as a normal or even necessary form of conflict resolution (Bandura et al., 1961).
Over time, this exposure blunts natural empathy responses, making children less emotionally reactive to suffering or harm inflicted on others. This desensitization disrupts the development of affective empathy and weakens prefrontal cortex inhibition, increasing the likelihood of impulsive or aggressive behavior in real-world social situations.
💣 “Murder Simulators” and the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Exposure to Media Violence
Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, former U.S. Army psychologist and internationally recognized expert on the psychology of killing, argues that modern entertainment is more than passive content, it's training. He and DeGaetano (2014) describe violent video games and films as “murder simulators,” conditioning children for predatory aggression through repetition and reward (Grossman & DeGaetano, 2014).
Their research shows that children exposed to this media become desensitized to violent crime, with neurological shifts that diminish empathy and mental health regulation (Grossman & Paulsen, 2016).
Grossman and Paulsen (2016) further argue that this exposure rewires the developing brain for aggressive behavior, creating a generation more prone to reactive aggression and emotional numbing (Grossman & Paulsen, 2016).
In his 2018 peer-reviewed article, Grossman emphasizes that media-induced aggression is not a correlation, it’s a causal risk factor for violent behavior in children (Grossman, 2018). He argues that repeated exposure to violent imagery functions as a form of behavioral conditioning, fundamentally altering children's emotional and neurological development in ways that prime them for aggression.
Grossman draws on military training methods to show that the same tools used to reduce soldiers' resistance to killing, such as repetition, operant conditioning, and desensitization, are present in violent video games and media consumed by children. This assertion challenges the commonly held belief that violent behavior is only influenced by individual temperament or environmental instability, making a strong case that the media itself is an active agent in shaping aggressive behavior.
Grossman’s work thus represents a pivotal shift in media psychology, reframing digital violence not just as content, but as a developmental risk factor with long-term implications for public safety and child mental health.
💪 From Aggression to Expression: Physical Outlets for Violence Prevention
If childhood exposure to violence alters how kids process emotion and threat, then mental health interventions must be embodied, not just cognitive. Physical outlets such as Evidence Based Self-Defense™, structured sports, and outdoor challenges help children convert aggression into focus, teamwork, and resilience.
These practices reduce reactive aggression by retraining the nervous system toward regulation rather than impulse. They also improve mental health, teaching children how to handle frustration, fear, and conflict without resorting to violent behavior.
If aggression can be learned, it can also be unlearned, provided children are given the right physical, emotional, and social spaces to grow.
🚨 What Now? Responding to the Rise of Aggression from Childhood Exposure to Violence
We can’t afford to passively consume the research. If we understand how childhood exposure to violence contributes to long-term aggression, then we must design environments that actively counteract it. Physical activity, group dynamics, and purpose-driven movement can rewire aggression into resilience.
Evidence-based self defense™ classes for children and teens are intentionally structured using validated psychological frameworks and trauma-informed methodologies to ensure that aggression is not suppressed, but safely expressed, redirected, and reinforced through positive social interaction and self-regulatory practice.
🚨 Prevent Violence by Designing Better Environments for Aggression
It’s time to take what we know about childhood exposure to violence and turn it into action. That means building schools, homes, and programs that recognize aggression as a natural response, but understand and are skilled in redirecting it into growth.
To prevent violence later in life, we must train the nervous system early.
Children who are taught a variety of coping skill are more likely to hit a punching bag instead of a peer, to breathe instead of lash out, to act with discipline rather than aggression, are less likely to commit or normalize violent crime.
We can’t eliminate aggression. But we can channel it.
🛡️ Evidence-Based Self Defense Training: A Psychological Tool for Resilience
Incorporating evidence-based self defense training into childhood development is more than a safety measure. it’s a physical and psychological intervention.
Structured Evidence based self defense training™ at Shaan Saar Krav Maga by the Shaan Saar LLC Security Group teaches children how to respond to threats without defaulting to impulsive aggression. It strengthens the prefrontal cortex, the brain region responsible for decision-making and self-regulation, allowing youth to reduce stress while managing fear and adrenaline in high-pressure scenarios.
These programs offer a physical and psychological alternative to acting out violently, promoting behavioral control and increased confidence.
When implemented properly, self defense training not only provides the framework for self advocacy and setting healthy boundaries but also creates a healthy context for physical expression, social interaction, and skill-building. Unlike aggressive contact sports or sport based martial arts environments, evidence-based curricula focus on psychological resilience versus dominance. This supports healthier peer relationships and fosters psychological well-being, especially in children exposed to violence or trauma.
Through repetition, modeling, and reflective practice, children develop a mental toolkit that can reduce stress, improve emotional regulation, and foster confident social interaction skills, all while learning to physically protect themselves if necessary.
By integrating Evidence Based Self Defense™ training into school and community programs, we give children an outlet that is not only physical, but deeply psychological. It’s time we treat aggression not only as a disciplinary problem, but as an opportunity for evidence-based, developmentally aligned growth.
🔥 From Aggression to Agency: How Empowerment Self Defense Builds Resilience in Children Exposed to Violence
Programming designed by Shaan Saar LLC and Shaan Saar Krav Maga supports mental health by helping children process fear, anxiety, and emotional dysregulation through safe, structured movement.
For children who have witnessed or experienced violent acts, learning how to defend themselves can restore a sense of agency and reduce feelings of helplessness. A trauma-informed approach to self defense training further ensures that instruction prioritizes emotional safety, de-escalation techniques, and the recognition of behavioral triggers rooted in mental health challenges.
Beyond physical skills, our programs can build resilience and contribute meaningfully to long-term mental health by offering therapeutic benefits through social connection, repetition, and stress relief.
When children are empowered to respond to conflict without resorting to violent acts, or aggressive behavior, we don't just reduce harm, we cultivate environments that promote regulation and ultimately lead to an improved overall sense of well being.
📚 References
Khadka, C. (2024). Social learning theory and the development of aggression
Saylor Academy (n.d.). Principles of Social Psychology: Sources of Social Knowledge
Grossman, D., & DeGaetano, G. (2014). Stop Teaching Our Kids to Kill
Grossman, D., & Paulsen, K. (2016). Assassination Generation
Grossman, D. (2018). On media violence and aggression
© 2025 [Renee Rose and Shaan Saar LLC]. All rights reserved. Reproduction or distribution without permission is prohibited.
